These jokey typography shirts sabotage themselves.

I've recently noticed a couple of t-shirts making typography jokes which (ironically, I guess?) have terrible typography. This is the sort of inattention to detail that make my hackles sit up and turn red.

Here's the first one: "I like my serifs classy". 

I'd like to think that even an untrained eye would notice that the space between those first and second lines doesn't look quite right. In typography this is called leading, which is an anachronistic word referring to the amount of space between lines of text, and it should be the same.

Here you can see how close the first and second lines are to each other. If there happened to be a 'g' or a 'p' in the top line, or a 'k' or a 't' in the second line, they'd crash into each other. Even the spacing between the other three lines is very tight, their letters nearly touching. The odd thing is, that somebody had to actually go in and try to make this mistake. Design applications, all of them, by default, apply the same amount of leading between lines of text. So the designer actually looked at these four lines, thought "Gee, there sure does seem to be an awful lot of space between those first two lines, I think I'll go in there and wreck the place up."

Anyway, I've taken the liberty of fixing it. 

The second example is "kerning matters."

Kerning is the space between two letters in a word. I'm reluctant to explain the joke, but here goes. Take the word 'kerning' and reduce the space between the letters 'r' and 'n' so they become so very close, and begin to look like the letter 'm'. So instead of 'kerning', you get 'keming'! Eh? Eh? It doesn't make sense anymore! Because of the... kerning! Kerning matters! Eh? Get it? ...  Yeah... trust me, it's very droll. 

The problem here is that this is one of those super esoteric, one-percent-of-the-people-who-see-it-will-get-it jokes, and the people who it's intended for, the people who would actually get the joke, are going to notice the terrible typography.

For starters, that's not an 'r' and an 'n', it's actually an 'm'. Helvetica Neue, 25 Ultra Light, if you happen to be interested.

This is what it looks like with the actual letters; the actual 'r' and 'n'.

So the joke isn't even accurate, but then there's also the terrible kerning. Look at the dearth of space between the 'm' and the 'i', and then at the galactic expanse between the 'i' and the 'n'. It's atrocious. Don't even get me started on the fact that they've left-aligned/rag-righted all of two words which are intended to be centered on the shirt.

Here's how it should look.

Notice the even and appropriate spacing between the 'm', the 'i', and the 'n'.

I wonder how it is that the people capable of thinking up these jokes could execute them so poorly. Maybe it says something about our education system, or the state of (and respect for) craftsmanship, or maybe the types of designers who end up making novelty t-shirts aren't necessarily of the highest caliber talent our profession has to offer. 

Please report any and all mistakes in this post to yeahyeaheveryonemakesmistakes@everyonesacritic.tld

Why Apple's Earnings Matter

The internet is all abuzz about Apple's earnings report. 

Apple exceeded all estimations, all rumors, all projections of their revenue and profit. By a lot, a lot, a lot. Consider that of all the most profitable quarters in recorded history, Apple is number four. The only technology company to make the list, in fact, the only company that isn't an oil company to make the list.

Besides the fact that these are enormous sums of money, outsiders may wonder why anyone who isn't a shareholder or stock broker would care. There are two reasons in particular that I want to mention.

1. In 1997, Apple was 90 days from going bankrupt.

In 15 years, Apple went from almost going out of business to being one of the most profitable, highest-valued companies on the planet. That any company can perform such a turn-around is worth noting, and remembering.

2. It puts the lie to the conventional wisdom of how to do business.

Every year, every quarter, every product launch, business writers, pundits, analysts, and journalists predict doom for Apple. These are the same people who claim that Apple's products are too expensive, too exclusive. They say that Apple needs to offer more products, more sizes, more specs, more configuration options. They they Apple "has" to release such-and-such a product, that Apple "must" sell products at a loss to remain competitive, that Apple will be "forced" to change how they do business. They say that Apple needs to be less secretive, be less of a closed-ecosystem; be more open. Essentially, they're constantly saying that Apple has to be more like all the other companies in the market, because that's just how business works, right?

In reality, this is how Apple works: they focus all their attention on a small number of exceptional products, sell those products at a profit, and tie all those products together in a self-contained ecosystem.

This is why Apple fans (and why I, as a designer) get so worked up about the earnings report. It justifies our outlook, as if to say, "See? SEE? It works! You can do business this way and be successful!" These earnings numbers prove false the conventional wisdom that the only way to run a profitable company is to flood the market with mountains of poorly-designed, cheaply-made, cheaply-produced products.

It's not just the products either. Apple's retail stores, environmental efforts, employee equality practices, and supply chain standards are all in conflict with the traditional conservative business routine.

To be fair, there was a lot of pent-up demand for iPhones, following the move of the iPhone 4S launch to fall from the summer launch window of previous iPhones. This will probably end up being truly a record quarter, an outlier. Still, the point remains that Apple can produce a record-breaking quarter by doing business their way, in defiance of what all the 'experts' say they must do. Maybe if other companies tried to emulate how Apple works instead of following conventional wisdom, our world would not be filled so many thoughtless, frustrating, garbage products.

Creatives.

This is just a zygote of an idea, but:

There are three types of creatives.

Process-driven creatives.
Those who rely upon a series of reliable methods to arrive at a result.

Inspiration-driven creatives.
Those who rely upon a muse, or a spark, to arrive at a result.

Motivation-driven creatives.
Those who require a purpose to arrive at a result.